


Your Last Name Sucks

by kirari_amiya



Series: Kirari's Overwatch Oneshots [6]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: M/M, brief mention of the amaris, dont you tell me that mccree wasnt practically an adopted son to the amaris, there's a small extra about them, this is pretty much a drabble
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-14
Updated: 2017-10-14
Packaged: 2019-01-17 02:02:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12355143
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kirari_amiya/pseuds/kirari_amiya
Summary: In which Jesse Mccree proposes in a really stupid way to Hanzo Shimada.





	Your Last Name Sucks

**Author's Note:**

> I remembered this percabeth post and I was like... Hm this sounds like a mchanzo thing as well.

Flicking the used cigarillo to the ground, he exhaled and let the wispy smoke dissolve into the night air "'Ey Hanzo," McCree waved a hand towards his boyfriend after a particularly tiring mission, the tattered ends of his scarlet serape shifting in the wind.

"What is it?" Hanzo replied, turning around to give the cowboy a blank look. But when Hanzo saw his face, all Hanzo could do was roll his eyes in annoyance.

Jesse McCree had that look in his eyes. That look where he looked liked he was dying of holding laughter in. Something which ressembled someone trying not die laughing.

Also known as: Jesse McCree is About to Tell Yet Again Another Horrible Joke. (Post Mission Edition!)

"What is it _this_ time?" Hanzo glanced wearily. His blank look had turned into a dead-looking stare. Hanzo was done. So done with Jesse's shitty jokes— they were even worse than the so-called 'dad jokes' from the pale haired vigilante Soldier: 76.

"I've been thinkin'," Jesse put a single leather gloved finger to his chapped lips. A spark of mischievousness in his eyes for a brief second. "Yer last name..."

"What about my last name?" Hanzo asked, slinging stormbow back across his shoulder, ready to make way back to the ship. "Nothing wrong with being a Shimada despite being infamous in Hanamura."

"Yer last name is... How do I say this..." Jesse coughed, trying to keep his laughter in, but choking on his spit. He opened his mouth, but stopped himself when no words came out. Then, Jesse uttered, very quickly: "Yer last name sucks. You should change it."

"Excuse me?" Hanzo looked extremely offended, his eyebrows creased and his mouth formed into a terrifying scowl which Jesse found cute. Being in love made stupid things likeable, apparently. Even a terrifying scowl from a Japanese man trained in assassination. "You insolent cowman! I'll have you know that—"

Jesse quickly shut him up, covering his mouth with one hand and using his other free hand to place his beloved hat on top of the Japanese man's petit head. "Let me finish, darlin'. I think that McCree would be a much more suitable last name for ya, don'tcha think?" His mouth bore the trace of the hint of a smug smirk.

Jesse McCree winked at the Shimada, leaving him stunned on the spot. Confused? Blushing?

And then the cowboy, completely drained of all the confidence from the stunt he had just pulled— he sprinted away, shoes clacking on the wooden floor.

He knew he wouldn't get very far, so he was thankful for Hanzo's confusion giving him the opportunity of a head start.

Hanzo was speechless, watching Jesse's figure get smaller and smaller in the distance.

"My last name holds my family's honour, thank you very much," he grumbled at no one. "And what does he mean? What does he think? Telling me that Shimada isn't a good last name and that McCree would be... Much better..."

Hanzo McCree...?

A sudden realisation.

Hanzo's face flushed red, flustered at the sudden revelation.

"Get back here cowman!" He raised his fist in the air, clutched the hat his boyfriend had left him and sprinted after the boyfriend of 3 years. "Did you just propose to me then run away...!?" He shouted, hoping that his idiotic, cowardly cowman would hear him.

"Maybe?" He heard an answer shouted back from the distance.

"GET BACK HERE AND PROPOSE PROPERLY!"

"NO!"

<omake>

"And that's how I proposed to him," Jesse chuckled nervously, a drop of sweat forming on his temple. He gritted his teeth nervously.

Fareeha was wiping a few tears, clutching her stomach. She laughed so hard that it was difficult to breathe.

Ana facepalmed and sighed. "Jesse McCree, you are a disappointment."

"I know, ma'am."


End file.
